Friday, July 17, 2009

Does Brad Pitt Change Diapers?

I never realized just how crazy and nosy people were until I became pregnant last June. People of all types (but mostly females, because as you know from my previous posts, they are motherfucking bonkers) would say to me and ask me super-TMI stuff.

My baby is now four months old and the insanity hasn't stopped. Here are some high(low?)lights:
  • Now that you know you are having a baby...the question is...are you two ready? (This coming from husby's "ultra-supportive" mother.)
  • Had you and your husband been trying to have a baby? (Oh, I'm sorry, I should have leaked the tapes like Ray-J and Kim Kardashian...)
  • Wow, you became pregnant so quickly after getting married! (CSI over here...nothing gets by you, huh?)
  • Wasn't she on the pill, though? (This came from one of my husby's male friends. Don't ask.)
  • Did you circumcise your baby? (No comment...)
  • Are you breastfeeding? Why not? (More on this sensitive topic can be found at my now infamous "Attack of the Breastfeeding Nazis" post.)
  • You should have more kids. (This topic will be covered in a future post, I promise.)
  • Does your husband change diapers????????????????
Okay, I really want to talk about that last question. Yes, my dear husby changes diapers. What kind of a question is that? No one asks him if I change diapers. The first few times I was asked this question, I didn't even care. Now, after being asked this on a daily basis, I am starting to get really pissed off. Hence this post.

I'm not here to spout off a bunch of feminist propaganda. And I know that every family and every relationship is different. What works for me may not work for everyone. People tell me all the time how wonderful my husband is because he changes diapers and takes care of the baby as often as he can when he is not working, commuting, running errands, etc. Don't get me wrong, I agree that husby is awesome...but not because he changes diapers. He is SUPPOSED TO DO THAT. I AM SUPPOSED TO DO THAT. THIS IS OUR CHILD, NUMBNUTS!

Husby is the shit (no pun intended!) because he supports me in all my endeavors while also reigning me when necessary. Before the baby was born, I never thought to ask husby IF he was going to change diapers and perform all the other baby-related tasks (well, not breastfeeding, duh). I KNEW he was going to do those things. I wouldn't have married the cat if I was unsure. I mean, really. Wake up, it's 2009.

Now, I'm not trying to sit here and say that he should do exactly 50% of the baby stuff. He can't...he owns his own company and has to work full-time plus. The thing is, I am ALSO working full-time plus. I may be on leave from my corporate job, but I am definitely putting in that overtime. So, because we both work like crazy, why should one of us get out of doing fundamental baby tasks?

Another interesting question related to the diapers topic is, "Are you back at work yet?". Hmm, no, I am still on vacation, I mean, maternity leave. Again, I know people mean no harm when they ask this, but again, COME ON. I thought I worked crazy hours at my corporate job! The baby keeps me busy even when he is down for a nap or for the night. I'm not one of the Real Housewives. I run a company, it's called Home, Inc. My husband and I are the co-CEOs and we have one direct report, the baby. In order to keep Home running smoothly, he and I have contribute as much as we can financially, emotionally, physically, etc.

Husby and I work together so that shit gets done. It doesn't really matter who does it. At the end of the day, the most important thing is that the baby is happy and healthy. That can only be accomplished by us being strong partners.


  1. My husband, on the other hand, does not change diapers. He made that clear from the get-go. I got mad on an occassion or two, but mainly I didn't mind. Having Lucas was worth the couple years of diapering. I like to give PK a hard time about it, especially now that we're diaperless. Its a little power struggle that he's really quite proud of winning. I mean, his eyes light up when he talks about all the diapers he didn't change! :D

  2. I hear that question being asked towards my co-worker all the time. It really archaic. These days, a guy better be a billionaire if he's expecting to not help with cooking, cleaning, dishes, laundry, and yes even diapers.

  3. Great post!

    I'm annoyed at myself for not having thought of the circumsize question!

    Haha JK. People are ridiculous. As irritating as it is -- at least it makes GREAT blog material!

    That's how I see every annoying situation.